"1. Bullying is not okay. Period.
2. Freedom of religion does not give you the right to
physically or verbally assault people.
3. If your sincerely-held religious beliefs require you to
bully children, then your beliefs are fucked up.”
~ Jim C. Hines
Jim C. Hines is on twitter as @jimchines.
His most excellent blog can be found
at http://www.jimchines.com/blog/
An excellent article on cyber-harassment written by him:
http://www.jimchines.com/2014/01/online-harassment/
Other articles of note:
http://freethoughtblogs.com/pharyngula/2014/01/10/lets-just-call-it-talking/
http://talkingpointsmemo.com/cafe/let-s-be-real-online-
harassment-isn-t-virtual-for-women
http://www.psmag.com/navigation/health-and-behavior/women-
arent-welcome-internet-72170/
Experiencing abusive behavior from others online?
Received threats due to stuff posted online?
Or, want to be part of the solution instead of the problem?
http://www.haltabuse.org/
Being fauxfended on the other hand is not the same thing at all. If you tell me that I am a big meanie poopy head because I happen to not agree with you, I can shrug that off easily enough.
If you accuse me of being stupid or racist or an anti-feminist or full of false ego or something, I can blow those comments off also.
A good solid definition can be found in The Urban Dictionary:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=fauxfended
Here are some articles and things that talk about people who were fauxfended:
http://thegraph.com/2012/09/personalities-vs-facts/
http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Journalism/2014/01/04/HuffPo-No-Apology-For-Pearl-Harbor-Insult-Is-Perfect-Response
http://sistertoldjah.com/archives/2013/01/08/class-act-katherine-webb-says-musburger-not-creepy-for-gushing-about-her-on-natl-tv/
http://kmgarcia2000.blogspot.com/2012/09/blaming-victims.html
What no one should blow off are threats such as "I'm going to rape you, kill you, or otherwise ef you up." That sort of thing ought to require the attention of the nearest law enforcement agency. [And hopefully, the nearest law enforcement agency will be better informed than the one here is and more equipped to skillfully handle a complaint of cyber-bullying than the one 'round here is].
radical sapphoq says: Some people use cyber-bullying as a convenient argument for using one's wallet name on the internet. I've seen people on Fakeboo, FedBoo, SpaceCase [using one of my fake socks because I will not help the government to collect info or meta-data on me], I mean that website-- you know the one I mean-- using their "real names" and making vicious comments about other people.
People are people whether using their legal names on the internet or not.
Those who are in the public eye tend to use their names online. The rest of us don't. Some of the rest of us have had problems with people stalking us [either online or in 'real' life F2F] or threatening us. Some of us may be hiding from a past domestic violence situation or other troublesome history and thus we cannot safely enjoy the internet using our wallet info. Some of us prefer that our bosses and our elderly relatives not be able to find us on the internet. Some of us value our privacy and refuse to give out our real names and locations. Some of us have more than one of the above listed reasons for a decision to use socks or pseudonyms online. Some of us may have solid reasons that I have not listed here.
I am against laws that require us to use our wallet information online and against laws that would assign each of us some sort of internet 'number' that a government can use to trace back to us. Period. The dark net has its uses. Hopefully, an alter-net will become a reality for those of us who refuse to succumb to the line of thinking that starts with the dreaded words "It's for your own good that we are...".
~ LESS GOVERNMENT MORE FUN ~
Friends don't let friends use Micro$oft though sometimes there is good info to be found there. One such example is found here at: http://www.microsoft.com/athome/security/children/kidpred.mspxMany of us who blog, post on boards, join e-groups forget that there are basic safety rules and we violate them without thinking. How many of us post our birthdates on our blogs? Town we live in? School we attend? Name of company we work at?Other folks are doing that too.Sooner or later, we may be instant messaging with others we have met during our internet pursuits.We are too casual. We think nothing of these things. And it may be that some of the threats have been exaggerated.Some stats may be inaccurate, yet the bottom line is when someone we know becomes a victim, the stats lose their meaning.We may have teens who have been sucked up into blogging and websites and e-groups and boards and on-line gaming and instant messaging as well.That sympathetic teen blogging "friend" or "buddy" in an e-group for teens looking for support and direction may not have their best interests at heart.Do we know who they are communicating with? Do we know who we are communicating with?Witness Yahoo 360 blogs where the ease of getting a yahoo ID can translate into many phoney identities. Nowadays we can be any name, age, or location that we choose to be.
Here and here are some basic safety rules that parents can implement for their children and teens. Actually, those rules would be pretty good for us adults to follow too.People, are we following the basics of internet safety?And parents, have you taught your children the basics of internet safety?
Parents, you should be actively monitoring what your children are doing on-line. On e-groups all over the net, there are teens and supposed teens who have posted their names, age, gender, and locations. Would your teen reveal similar information in an introductory post to an e-group?
Parents, you should be actively monitoring what your children are doing on-line.Bullying is no longer restricted to the schoolyard. Adults can and do bully other adults on the internet on posting boards, e-groups, and in the on-line gamerooms. They can bully other adults via e-mails and blog comments. Adults can bully children and teens. Children and teens can bully each other. Although sometimes people can have conflict which is not bullying, conflict can escalate into bullying or other anti-social behavior. There are also individuals who delight in generating conflict on-line in newsgroups, e-groups, and anywhere that people electronically gather. Educate your teen on internet trolls and how to deal with them. Teach your teen that feeding trolls only encourages them further. Trolls may evolve into full-blown cyber-stalkers.
Parents, you should be actively monitoring what your children are doing on-line. Anyone can be a victim of a cyber-stalker. The Instant Messenger buddy who insists upon knowing why your teen wasn't on-line at the usual time, the blogging acquaintance who investigates your teen [and family] and then publishes personal info on-line [like your phone number] or shows up unannounced at school or job are exhibiting some of the characteristics of cyberstalkers. The religious guru who is running your teen's e-group may be a cult in the making and the malcontent who bombards your teen's e-mail account with threats of legal action may be a bully. The cyber-stalker will invade your teen's life by showing up at your front door or consistently at the electronic gameroom or teen chat.There is a heap of information on-line about remaining safe in cyber-space.Here are some ideas gathered from those places:Be the parent. Set guidelines and rules for internet usage. Put the computer in a family room. Remain in that room when your children are on-line. Monitor their e-mail. Monitor their blogs.Talk about keeping private information private, fighting, bullying, cyber-stalking, and trolling.Teach them conflict resolution skills.Show them how to disengage from any internet contact that feels uncomfortable to them.Tell them: no phone calls, no presents, no photos.Forbid them to meet any of their on-line acquaintances in person ever-- unless you are present and the meeting takes place in public.Pay attention to any personality changes or behavior changes in your child. They may indicate a problem that needs looking into.Those suggestions apply to all of us of all ages.
Be safe, and play safer,
radical sapphoq
